It’s really here, and it feels authentic, like the shoe fits–a good running sneaker. The whole “Poetea” idea had to be scrapped because I just wasn’t in that brand. My identity was not corresponding to the “Teatime” vibe. The products are right, but the name of the store and the logo were all wrong. I realized that my true voice in the brand was actually hiding in one t-shirt design, my favorite t-shirt, the “Starving Artist” one. Like opening my eyes to the sun after a few hours in the theater, I was able to see myself in this phrase. This was me: a starving artist: something I might always be, this cliche that’s underpaid and somehow still exists.

Ask AI to make you a picture of a starving artist and see what it gives you. I can show you what I got from it:

There it is, what the whole world (the internet content, rather) perceives as a starving artist. I’m surprisingly younger than how AI defines me (a starving artist). I also can’t afford to have my own studio space. I do suffer from the messiness and the beta vibes–and the comfy clothes sneaker vibes too.

“Beta vibes” could refer to a particular set of characteristics or feelings associated with the beta version of a product, software, or concept. In this context, “beta” typically indicates a stage of development where something is not yet fully polished or finalized but is in the process of being tested and refined. Therefore, “beta vibes” might imply a sense of being a work in progress, experimental, or not yet fully matured. It could also suggest a feeling of being innovative, cutting-edge, or open to feedback and improvement. (OpenAI)

“Starving Artist” feels like me because it is me. Starving artists, like teachers and community helpers, are plagued with this silent philosophy that everyone seems to agree with: it’s okay for creatives and community helpers to be poor because the work they do transcends materialism and wealth. Poverty is a symbol of our sincerity: we care more about community and culture than we care about money. It’s a badge of honor, this poverty, and I’m proud to wear it, as an educator and an artist.

But I don’t buy that I need to stop there, that my sincerity is cheap. I refuse to accept the notion that my sincerity must remain confined to this state of scarcity. Sincerity can cross over into profit-driven industries, specifically lifestyle brands. With sincerity comes loyalty and relationships, items that lend themselves well to enticing copywriting and powerful marketing.

I reject the idea that my sincerity is inherently devalued by seeking financial success. While I honor the sincerity inherent in poverty, I also recognize the potential for sincerity to flourish in pursuits that offer financial prosperity. The starving artist doesn’t have to starve.

STARVING ARTIST SHOP/MERCH